The Top 5 Phrases We've GOT To Stop Using

All of the phrases here pretty much mean this.

Throughout my time in life, we sometimes get slack with our language. We will say stuff that the common mind won't find abnormal, but people who like to dissect and analyze English realize that some of the things we say are kinda dickish. There are just some phrases out there that--when I see them--I want to slap whoever said it (punch if it's the Top 2).

Here, I'm going to lay out the phrases I hate seeing and why. Remember that this is a personal opinion of mine, so don't think this is some sort of an official list.

Number 5: "No offense, but..."


I think most anyone reading this has at least heard this phrase before. This phrase isn't all that offensive to most but--to some--this is hypocrisy at its finest. Saying "No offense, but your reviews suck." Is basically saying, "Suck my dick, and your reviews suck." Seriously. You're trying to sound non-offensive but you are going to say it anyways. It's like saying, "Not trying to be racist or anything, but blacks are really stupid." You can't be much more of a hypocrite than that.

Thankfully, I've noticed most people tend to not use this phrase as much and have somewhat replaced it with, "With all due respect...", which sounds a lot better in my opinion.

Number 4: "That's nice."


This is one of those lackluster phrases that is as bland as you can get. It's one of those things your dad or mom told you when you showed them a drawing you made during preschool. They'd reply with, "That's nice.", which at that time, your brain probably couldn't put pieces together and realize that it's almost like another way of saying, "Whatever." It just sounds more polite to say. Whenever I hear this, I basically hear, "Whatever, I don't care." and then I proceed to bitch slap.

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Number 3: "Good for you!"


This phrase just makes me grind my gears. It's saying, "That's good for you, but it doesn't help me out in any way, so leave me alone!" Every time I see someone say this, I leave yet another dent in my desk, which brings it one step closer to be grinded into toothpicks one day. It's become so common that it's used sarcastically, for example:

Asshole A: "Hey, man, I just totally got in bed with your girlfriend!"

Asshole B: "Good for you!"

Asshole A: "...Wait, I don't think you heard me right, dude."

Asshole B: "I'm too wasted to give a damn."

Number 2: "Whatever."

This phrase needs to die. It really does. Some of these phrases are basically, "Whatever." in a polite sense. But when you don't even try, that pisses some people off. It's like a verbal slap to the face; no matter what you say or do to it, it ain't budging. And it makes you angry physically. I don't even understand this phrase grammatically, "What ever"? What the fuck does that mean? You don't care what happens or what the next case scenario is, so you just say, "What ever?" I don't know. And that makes me have an even bigger headache.

Number 1: "Don't insult God."

This phrase I basically hear all the time down here in the south. People here seem to love being creationists and yet love hunting. I don't know, figure it out yourself.

But not just them; I'm sure there are others in the country (and probably others) who do too. If I were to walk in my school and say I'm atheist, or even agnostic, things would be really rough. They'd be having church sessions just revolving around me for not believing in God, 100%, no questions whatsoever. Whenever someone says this or something similar (Ex: Believe Jesus is your savior or you will burn in Hell, don't use the name of the lord in vain, etc.), I painfully wish to give them the bloody nose of a lifetime.

I'm stretching it on this one a little, I know, but I'd rather punch a fucker who says this to me than someone who says "Whatever." I don't insult you for believing in God, don't insult me for not believing in him. We need to stop making religion such a damn touchy subject down here.